We would always sing his name...

Whenever Craig and I saw Owen, we would sing his name. We wouldn't say "Owen," we would sing "Oooo-weennn." That's just how happy he made us when we saw his precious face. He made us want to sing. I'm starting to struggle as time passes by. His memories are forever in my mind, but I feel like he's slowly slipping away from us. In the beginning all I would do is picture him running around the house, now I'm starting to feel like it's not as easy to do that. Because the time is getting longer since he's actually been here. That's terrifying to me. It's so hard to grieve because you feel like you don't want to hurt anymore, but then again does not hurting anymore mean you forget and you don't miss that person as much? I've certainly never been in this position before and do not know how to handle it. I wake up everyday feeling differently. And I cannot tell you how I may feel tomorrow or the next day or the next. But I do know that I will always have that baby boy's beautiful face on my mind. I'm so thankful for my memories and I'm hoping and praying those will never disappear. We have to do things to honor his memory and I plan to do just that.

We will be planning a 5k run/walk in august, which is close to Owen's birthday, August 8th. All money raised will benefit Hands of Hope. It's a hospice group my dear friend Jena Martin works with. They work with terminally ill children. Even though the circumstances with Owen are horrible and we hurt so bad with him gone, we did not have to see him suffer. So knowing that Owen's smile would brighten anyone's day, we are hoping this race can raise money to brighten the lives of those children who are sick. Especially to help them smile. In that way, I know Owen's short life has a HUGE purpose. He changed our lives and I'm hoping he can change others too. Once things get up and running and details are planned for the race, I will post that information on my facebook page.

Please continue to pray for me and my family. October 12, 2013 was the most horrible day of our lives. We had no idea we would no longer have our baby. The shock and horror of it all seems so impossible to think about. The grieving process definitely comes in different stages. I know there are so many people who love and miss Owen. I appreciate everyone who has taken the time to honor our little boy's life and his memory. My brother's family visited his graveside the other day. My nephew Thomas remembers how my mom would always sing patty cake to Owen. "And put it in the oven for Owen and me" she would sing. When they visited his grave, they sang that song to him. Hearing stories like this make me feel better because I know other's still remember him and want to keep him a part of their lives too. Such a special sweet boy my Owen was...I love you bunk bunk.